Hey you, it's been awhile, I miss our walks, our talks, things are changing, where's the one of whom I fell in love?

^Those song lyrics are mine incidentally. I wrote this song over a year ago. About someone else. However, I keep finding that many breakup songs can fit the situation over and over and over again. This one is particularly personal, but I still find that parts of it work for many different situations.

It's basically a song about a guy and a girl who are good friends, date briefly and then the guy just disappears from her life. "Where's the one of whom I fell in love?" Other important lines include, "Hey boy, won't you meet me by the beach wall, we'll take a walk there and maybe we'll even figure out," and "We were way in over our heads and you would follow where you were led and we could never find the right route, I only wanted to help you out, so take a step back and then you'll see all the bullshit you gave to me, you took me in, you spat me out."

And I wrote this over a year ago. I really should just become a psychic and call it a day. Get an office. Put up my name in neon lights on the door, fill the room with incense and beaded...items and spew bullshit from my mouth on a daily basis.

That's beside the point.

More important than love this song is about friendship. It's about relationships screwing up all that's good. We were friends. We liked each other. And I don't mean that in a sexual or lovey dovey way. We liked each other's company. Or else I liked your company. WE WERE FRIENDS. Where'd that go?

RULE #1: RELATIONSHIPS SCREW UP THE BEST OF FRIENDSHIPS...LIKE BIG TIME.

I had a dream last night. It was simple, much like many of my dreams and you were in it and you were talking to me and you were stressed. You just needed a friend and I was there and I wanted to be there and, more importantly, you WANTED ME THERE. It was exciting and new and I felt happy and then I woke up and realized it was a dream and felt...sad.

We were friends. Good friends. I hate when things get screwed up.

AND THAT'S ALL I WANT. I realized that. Yesterday. I realized it's not about our relationship, it's not about how it didn't work, it's not about your religion, my religion, our differences, it's not about your homework or my spontaneity, it's not about band or chorus or the piano or your plays or my music or any other FUCKING thing in this world. IT'S ABOUT OUR FRIENDSHIP. That's why I'm sad. I became friends with you. I liked you. I liked being around you. You made me feel better. You knew how to make me feel better. Even if you didn't realize it and I liked that. And now that's gone. And hey, I'll be okay, it's not like my world is gonna come crashing down but it's a comfort thing. I liked you there.

But you're gone. And you don't seem to miss my company and that really hurts. Because at the very least, even if you didn't want to have sex with me or if you loved solving equations more than me or if you loved musical theater more than me or if you loved ANYTHING IN THE WORLD more than me, I thought you liked me company. I thought you did.

Now I realize, you're faker than I thought. That really sucks. But hey, I'll get over it.

You know, soon.